I was seated on a chair with my djembe between my knees, but I wasn�t playing, I was thinking about some things� you know... A cd was running too, pretty full blast� and then this track came on, and I just started this kind of dance that makes your neck stiff and your throat acid and painful, so much your heart is pumping fast after.

The muscles of my shoulders are stiff too now, cuz I played djembe very badly next.

I watch through the window, and my arms hurt, because I have nobody to hug.

So� what to do about it, and about everything�

I�ve got not much time to live anymore� 58 years, 10 years� or 2 months� it�s the same. Your time is counted, you will move from here soon� do as if it was 2 months man� stop the shit, and do like hell what you�ve always had in the heart� be in a travel state of mind, travel, reach the things, be strong and light...

But I don�t know what I want really� To make music? To have a child? To go in Africa? In Mexico?

I�m not alone, all the girlie�s arms I can�t touch are part of life� and life is what I will reach at the end of the fight. Death itself will be overcome. Life has a plan for me, and I am straight in the middle of it. I stay quiet, each second the Universe is stroking my face. Ok, let�s go, I�m all ears� Shut up, everything�s perfect, call your mom and say hi! � - how are you son?� � - oh, er� er� I�m ok. �

I know, I�m deranged, far from the flesh of life... I would like anybody to be in my house right now�

May I kidnap you? May I? Nobody? I�m a nice kidnapper�

You could show me what human life is, I only see mineral things.

*

I want to see movies and movies� to see faces, and stories.

*

In the diary of Parabola77, you can see that, once: i believe i've reached the apex of my lack of cognitive clarity. it's all downhill from here baby.

In the diary of Natasha5, this moment: oh yes. i remember. something good did happen yesterday. i ran into this guy i hadn't seen in a while (from st thomas) and his response to "hi, andrew lyons!" was, "oh my god you're beautiful!" so yeah. that was a plus.

In Untame-able�s one: "Then I realized that playing dead doesn't work when the bear is already trying to eat you."

In the diary of charleyriver the title is: signals for someone who is not there, the one of Natasha5 is: I made it for you but it went to the devil and the one of labeled-girl is: johnny johnny American laid.

Somewhere in Bluechicken�s one, you can read the song: "I hope I cut myself shaving tomorrow, I hope it bleeds all day long (�) I am drowning, There is no sign of land"...

and i like it much.